Asking Eric

Dear Eric: My niece contacted me and said she was coming to a college reunion near me. She wondered if she and her family could stay at my home during the weekend. I was happy to have them, and they had a good time. My wife and I cooked several meals for them and loaned them a car. Their final evening, we all went out to dinner (six of them and two of us), and when the bill came it was placed on the table between my nephew and me. He never made a move, so I reached for it and paid for it all. He didn’t offer to share and, in not doing so, didn’t even give me the chance to express my generosity and say, “I’ve got it.” I felt disappointed and used. How would you have handled this?

Dear Eric: My sister (85) and I (80) have been estranged for about five years. My niece invited us for Thanksgiving dinner just before this fallout. She was also inviting relatives of her fiancé who are active Scientologists, a religion that has a well-documented distaste of homosexuals.

Dear Eric: My younger sister, Lucy, and I are both in our 20s and share an apartment.

Dear Eric: My husband passed away unexpectedly at a young age. I am a few years younger than he was, so of course it was a shock. The problem is a friend, “Nancy”, discussed details surrounding his passing I would not have shared. It created the additional stress of people I hadn’t heard from in years contacting me and I clearly didn’t inform them.

Dear Eric: I am two months pregnant, or so I thought. Three months ago, I met Steve at a concert. Our relationship developed quickly, and we became intimate after only a few weeks.

Dear Eric: My son, who is 31, still lives at home. He is a great person and is not antisocial. He has a job that doesn’t pay much. I want him to start his own life. I push him to get a better job so that he can afford to live on his own, but he is very resistant to my pleas.

Dear Eric: I told my husband I was done in our marriage during a marriage-counseling session close to nine months ago. This was our second round of marriage counseling. I have also done some therapy on my own. I have not taken any actions to indicate I’m done other than to occasionally remind my husband that I’m the one that wants out when he thinks things are harmonious.

Dear Eric: I have a friend who I’ve been friends with for about 10 years. We both share views that lean left. In the past we’ve shared many dinners discussing the inequities of our country and other political type topics. My friend is constantly lamenting about how unfair our society is and is super empathetic to the plight of the disadvantaged, which I understand.

Dear Eric: I will turn 65 in a few months and have announced my plans to retire. I have a long list of things I want to do, and after 50 years of employment and saving, I am well situated for these next years. At least, that is what my financial adviser and balance sheets tell me.

Dear Eric: Christmas is a very difficult time for me, and I typically don’t celebrate as I don’t have any close family, and it only brings back painful memories. I moved a couple years ago and found a very great group of friends that have quickly become my chosen family. I was determined to take back how I felt about Christmas and began to host a Christmas dinner.